Fun Things to Tell People at Parties

Posted on January 19, 2012 by dbo394778056

1. “I won’t drink blood tonight.”
2. “Man, I’m way too drunk to fight naked!”
3. “I’m going to clone my favorite flea.”
4. “I’m a strip-o-clown enthusiast.”
5. “I’m a field internal plastic surgeon. I can reshape your pancreas in the kitchen with a spoon if you want”
6. “I used to be rich. Now I love shrimps.”
7. “You know, I can murder you in this basement and no one will notice.”
8. “You aura is pulsing to the left. When is the last time you had it aligned?”
9. “I’ve been a financial advisor to Bernie Madoff and Enron.”
10. “I’m a Scientologist. I’m Xenu’s brother-in-law.”