You just can’t understand a word of what it says. “Turn right on 5th Avenue” sounds more like “tumveon fifvenu”.
Sometimes tell you to turn as you’re in the middle of the intersection or be unresponsive a 3 to 5 minutes; lost in its thoughts.
The Passive Aggressive
Might give you wrong directions or conveniently forget to tell you to turn if you don’t follow its direction. Can hold a grudge for weeks.
The Vulgar Uncle
You can’t use your GPS if the kids are in the car unless you download the Censor 2.0 module. Even then, all you hear is “beeeep turn left on that beeeep street, son of a beeeep!”
The Segway Narrator
Over explain so much you will miss most turns. “In 0.2 kilometer, turn…” “Did you know the etymology if the word kilometer is from ancient Greek and is composed of khilioi meaning “thousand and of metron meaning measure and that…”
The Volume Defier
Sometimes whispers, sometimes shouts like a madman.
The Dirty Pervert
Makes anything sound dirty with suggestive emphasis on some sounds or words. Perfect for frat boys or very lonely women. “Make a nice and tight left turn. Oh yeah, real tight.”