How to Handle Telemarketers

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  1. I’m the hostage taker. Can John call you back as soon as I untie him?
  2. Mr. Smith is not here but I’m naked and full of peanut butter. What are you wearing?
  3. Mrs Monroe is not there, but may I interest you in Scientology?
  4. I’m not doing so well… I just lost my job, my wife left with my
    6 kids, I was told last week I have AIDS and my dog died this morning.
    Can I help you with something?
  5. What’s your home address? I’ll visit you tonight to get more information.