Welcome to Thor High!

Thor High is a college preparatory school dedicated to the highest academic standards for the development of moral character, the enrichment of spiritual lives, and the perpetuation of growth in Norse ideals.
Statement of Faith
To ensure the perpetuation of these basic concepts, it is resolved by the founders of the school that all those who become associated with Thor High must believe and publicly acknowledge his belief in the divine inspiration of the Eddas and the Heimskringla, that Odin created the world out of nothing, that Thor our Lord and Savior is the preexistent Son of Odin and was born of Jörd, a virgin, that He died to pay the price of the sins of all people, that He was bodily resurrected from the grave, and that, by repentance and acceptance of and belief in Him, by Odin’s grace, the individual is saved to abundant and eternal life in Valhalla located in Asgaard, in the presence and power of the nine worlds. It is further resolved that the teachings of this school shall never deviate from the above principles.
Under the constant guidance of our core values (courage, force, vengeance and patience), students will learn the beliefs, art and crafts of the great Norse People, as created by Odin.Courses include:

  • Poems, Tales and Songs
  • Advanced Navigation
  • Agriculture Techniques and Soil Science
  • Weapon Making
  • Pillaging 101
  • Fur & Metal: Fashion of the Gods

Why do you believe in God?

If you do believe in God, please take a few moment and answer as honestly as you can. You can also post a comment and let me know.

  1. Your parent told you so and you never questioned them.
  2. Your family, friends and community believe, so do you.
  3. You simply feel it in your heart.
  4. You are afraid of what would happened if you don’t (hell or God’s anger).
  5. You want the reward (eternal life in heaven).
  6. You want to meet your deceased loved ones again at some point.
  7. It feels good to think someone is watching over you.
  8. You believe that it helps you with hope, happiness, etc through answers to your prayers.
  9. It is the only option that gives order to your reality; that explains the human presence, the human consciousness, as well as the physical reality.
  10. You studied, analyzed and compared all viable options (theistic and non-theistic) and came to the conclusion that God exist, He is the only God, things written or commonly accepted about Him are true and it is in your interest to believe in Him, as well as to follow his commands as written in your translation of the Bible.

The New WWF

deliciouslyquirky latex suit

Welcome to the new Wildlife Wrestling Federation, where pandas wrestle koalas, bears wrestle gerbils and lemurs wrestle possums.

Only on Pay-per-View!

Super Grand Master Psychic Premium Deluxe Pro +

Don’t be fooled by regular run-of-the-mill Master Psychics. We offer reading that are 79% more accurate than Master Psychics*, sound 87% more mysterious and have a much more impressive name.

Other psychics will tell you “you will meet someone tall” — we can tell their driver’s license number, shoe size and bank account security access code.

As far as you know, we are not using the methods other psychics are using, such as the shotgun approach, rapid-fire, fishing for answers, or body-language readings. We only use 100% pure natural cold-pressed virgin psychic energy from the rainforest.

Come see us today! We’ll both feel better about our future.

* based on our own estimate. Results may vary and are guaranteed 100%, except when it applies to fact-checking, inquiries or follow-ups. Do not take internally. Not recommended to carbon-based life forms. Not suitable for advice on any action. Not responsible for expectation, hopes or lack of results.

Specialized Zoology Careers

Insect and Invertebrate Psychologist
When your ant colony starts to behave erratically or when your grubs seem depressed, it’s time to call the Insect and Invertebrate Psychologist. Your insects will resume their tasks orderly and your invertebrates will crawl happily again with what will seem to be a tiny smile, guaranteed or your money back!

Insect Taxidermist
Your favorite flea died and you want to preserve it in all its glory? The Insect Taxidermist can help. You will be able to proudly display your beloved flea on your mantle piece for years to come.

Pet Tattoo Artist
Want your Poodle to look more effeminate with a rose on its butt? Wish your hamster would look meaner with a barbwire on its tiny biceps? Wait no more! You can now give your pet the gift of ink!

Larva Fashion Designer
It’s not because you’re half an inch long and live underground that you have to look frumpy! Those adorable larvae can now accessorize like a socialite!

Impressive Credentials

Paradigm Leverage Symbiotic Two-Tier Reorganization Diploma from the Jarnonex Business Institute.

Masters in Partial Questioning from the Trivial Pursuit Casual Knowledge Center.

New Age
Passive Reflective Non-Committal Certificate of Existing from the Still Water Academy of Intemporal Arts.

Associate Doctorate in Cosmetic Cerebral Enhancement from the Happy Clown Travelling School of Neuro Surgery.

New Age
Diploma in Holistic Telluric Current Usage in Ectoplasm Rebirthing from the Center for the Karmic Multiverses.

PH.D. in Large-Scale Terraforming from the Interstellar Academy of Planetary Rejuvenation.