über
Often used in a ParisHilton-ish way to emphasize a quality, as in: OMG, this colonoscopy tube was über deep!

licious
Suffix added to a noun to add a sexy and playful quality, like in the new IRS taxlicious, the gynecologist’s papsmearolilious, or atomic bombilicious.

Smart
Prefix used to make the customer think they are buying something special with extra features for a premium price, such as the Smart-Laxative or Smart-Door Stopper.

Extreme
Prefix giving a sense of excitement and danger, like in Xtreme-Stamp Collecting, Xtreme-Accounting, and Extreme Rollerblade Roof Racing.

Green
Gives the impression the product is beneficial for the environment, no matter how insignificant the advantage really is, as in Green-Tar, Green-Cigar and the Green Giant.

Vlad “The Empaler” Romanoff, 8-time World “Unprovoked Savage Attack” Champion
vs
Benjamin “Shadow Mover” Finckelstein, 5 times Sudoku World Champion

Craig Hornez, Undefeated Bare Knuckles Skull Crushing Champion
vs
Timmy lester, 4 times “Huge Antique Bicycle Riding” General’s Cup Regional Champion

Roberto “Slicer” Rodrigez, 2001-2010 Intercontinental Machete Champion
vs
3 times Gold medalist, 100m Olympic Sprinter

Thorgal Swensson, Scandinavian Axe Throwing Champion
vs
Martha DuPont, 2002 Ohio Cupcake Face-off Winner

Phil Alan Guthrie, Sentenced to 210 life terms for 53 homicides
vs
Theodore “The Widow Maker” Statham, Senior Tax Collector, IRS

1. A 68 year-old men that is pretty mature for his age.
2. A fairly tall giant.
3. A politician that is not straightforward.
4. A big sumo.
5. A lazy cat.
6. A hyper-active Chihuahua.
7. A crack addict that is not reliable.
8. A cult-leader that is slightly creepy.
9. A monster truck announcer that is shouting.
10. A pretty accurate watchmaker.

1. Senior Prevention: Lures & Traps to Get Rid of Your Seniors
2. Modern Medicine: How Amulets, Charms and Incantations Can Replace Doctors
3. Financial Forecasting Using Dreams, Oracles and Prophecies
4. Auto-Surgery for Dummies
5. Faith-based Education: Make Fear and Stoning Work for You!
6. Cooking Humans: 150 Great Recipes for the Holidays
7. The No-Limit Diet: Loose Muscle Weight by Eating AS MUCH Junk as you Want!
8. How to Convert Your Basement into a Dungeon in 3 Days
9. 12 Creative Ways to Hide a Body in Your House
10. How to Create Accidents and Never Get Caught

Glossolalia is the technical term for “Speaking In Tongues”. It can be seen in Christian Pentecostal churches, in some shamanic and voodoo rituals as well as on Youtube.

It is written in the Bible that people will be able to speak in tongues (Mark 16:17, Acts 2:4, Acts 10:46, 1 Corinthians 13:1). I have a few questions about it though:

Is there a way to tell the difference between someone speaking in real tongue and, say, someone making the stuff up as he or she goes?

I can pretend to speak Chinese, Russian and German on the spot. Does it count?

I would be more impressed by someone who converts to Christianity, then starts to speak fluent upper-class Sumerian than by someone who sounds like a drunken babbling buffoon who pretends to speak the language of the angels. Really.

I will now write in tongues for you. Ready?

“Lalana Optepth Ismaereit gahna ourah smill! Oura Karh delo pseir ricr.”

Was it the angels speaking through me or was I just making it up? How do you know?